Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Does My Carbon Footprint Look Big In This?

Since eco-something is all the rage this season, Nicky and I join the in-crowd:

-- Low flow restrictors on our taps
-- Shower together
-- Work together and therefore travel to together
-- Compost kitchen waste
-- Use grey water from showers and cooking on the garden
-- Have a drought resistant, largely native garden
-- Do the cute little 'reduce, reuse, recycle' mantra where appropriate
-- Switch off unused appliances/lights
-- Replacing incandescent globes with compact fluoros
-- Cook with fresh in-season local ingredients
-- Buy antiques and funky retro pieces instead of buying new...

Well I thought with all this green stuff I must be positively verdant.

Alas, how wrong I was.

'Tho Nicky and I live modestly, we're environmental bigfoots according to this little game from the Powerhouse Museum.

Despite our best efforts, we 'hog' 6 hectares of resources for our lifestyle when in order to save the planet we need to be consuming less than 2 hectares.

As you might gather, I was very dismayed.


'What would I need to do to save the planet?' I pondered. So I did the test again.

What if I was an 'eat like a sparrow' vegetarian who lived alone in a solar powered caravan with energy-efficient appliances, who recycled and walked everywhere?

Could that appease the great goddess Gaia?


It was three hectares.

I wept.


What does she want with us?

And then I understood.


She wants us dead.

And Gaia's worshippers are misanthropists who use the environmental cause to manifest their own self-loathing.

-- Nora

No comments: