No, it's not Christmas - it's the Australian Federal Election and to make the evening's commentary more enjoyable and memorable (or not as the case may be), Nick and Nora (along with friends near and far - [Hi Neto!]) will be enjoying the:
Federal Election Drinking Game
There is a number of different ways to enjoy this game. It depends on your mood, but rest assured, regardless of the choice, you're guaranteed plenty of elbow exercise
Each person should do one (or more) of the following:
Have a drink at the ready to start at beginning of television news.
Chug at the phrase: "The polls have closed" or a variation thereof
[A] Select an issue and keywords associated with it:1. Industrial Relations (Unions, Workchoices, AWAs)
2. The Economy (interest rates, employment, economic management/conservative)
3. Social Issues (health, education, childcare, school fees)
4. Environment (climate change, Kyoto, drought, clean coal, nuclear)
Whenever one of the key phrases associated with your issue arises in commentary - take a sip (or a chug for the more adventurous).
A double chuck if the commentary refers to your seat.
[B] Select a TV commentator's cliched catch phrase:1. Bellwether Seat
2. Too Close To Call
4. Line Ball
And, you know the drill.
[C] But it's not all drinking you know. Every time key personnel appears on screen or is mentioned in commentary you must do the following:Kevin Rudd: Stick your finger in your ear and say "Zob, zob, zob"
Peter Garrett: Pretend you've been struck by 240 volts and sing: "US Forces give the nod."
Pauline Hanson: Call out, "Please, exploin?"
John Howard: Fluff up your eyebrows and say, "My fellow Australians"
Peter Costello: Smirk enigmatically.
Bob Brown: Sing out: "Every Man I Love is Either Married, Gay, or Dead"
What To DrinkIf you want to be perfectly conventional, beer or wine is acceptable.
However, if you're looking for a little more zing, select the following recipes, although for the truly bipartisan you'll have to have one of each:
Union League Cocktail
1 1/2 oz. Gin
1 oz. Ruby Port
Dashes Orange Bitters
Combine gin, ruby port and orange bitters in a shaker filled with ice, shake and strain into a chilled martini or cocktail glass.
Liberal Party Supporters:
The Daiquiri Liberal
1 oz white rum
1/2 oz sweet vermouth
1 dash Amer Picon orange bitters
Stir all ingredients in a mixing glass half-filled with ice cubes. Strain into a cocktail glass, and serve.
National Party Supporters
2 oz rum
3 dashes apricot brandy
1/2 oz pineapple juice
3 dashes lime juice
Pour the rum, apricot brandy, pineapple juice and lime juice into a cocktail shaker half-filled with ice cubes. Shake well, strain into a cocktail glass, and serve.
Democrats Party Supporters
1.5 Ounces Dark Rum -
1 Ounce Light Rum -
.5 Ounce Creme de Noyaux -
.5 Ounce Triple Sec -
1.5 Ounces Lime Juice
Shake with ice and strain into a highball glass
Pauline Hanson/One Nation Supporters
Red Head On The Moon
1 tsp DeKuyper Sour Apple Pucker Schnapps
1 dash Cranberry Juice
1 tsp Melon liqueur
1 tsp Sweet & Sour Mix
1/4 oz. Vodka
Layer in a shot glass.
The Greens Supporter
1 oz vodka
1 oz peach schnapps
1 oz DeKuyper Sour Apple Pucker schnapps
1 oz coconut rum
1 oz sweet and sour mix
Pour all ingredients into a cocktail shaker half-filled with ice cubes. Shake well and pour over ice cubes in an old-fashioned glass. Serve with a lime wedge.
1/2 measure grenadine
1/2 measure lemon syrup
3 measures tonic water
soda water to top up
Shake the ingredients well with ice and strain into a tumbler.
Top up with soda water. Add ice cubes if liked.
By the end of counting you're guaranteed to either be entertained, drunk or comatose.
And that's a core promise.