Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Slow Service Killer Attracts No Time At All

A man complained about slow service in a restaurant. Witnesses had said he was "abrupt and rude" to the owner's wife:

When she told her husband about this exchange, he became upset and a fight erupted... (her husband) went to the kitchen and got a short-bladed paring knife... (and) swung at him (the complainer), stabbing him three times in the left side of the torso." (He) died the next day.

Justice Bell sentenced Vo to seven years in jail with a non-parole period of four years.
The moral of the tale might have been 'don't complain about poor service' but is actually 'if you're going to quite deliberately murder a person, do it in Australia'.

-- Nick

Hasta La Vista, Baby

Someone's been watching too many Terminator movies:

INCREASINGLY autonomous, gun-toting robots developed for warfare could easily fall into the hands of terrorists and may one day unleash a robot arms race, a top expert on artificial intelligence says. "They pose a threat to humanity," said University of Sheffield professor Noel Sharkey
But there is a solution: outright ban on autonomous weapons systems. "We have to say where we want to draw the line and what we want to do – and then get an international agreement," he said.
It appears it's not just the robots whose intelligence is artificial.

Cool pics, though.

-- Nick

More Trouble For Tate

A few weeks ago we mentioned Gold Coast mayoral candidate Tom Tate and questioned the wisdom of the Queensland Liberals in selecting such a character to head their attempt to grab power in Australia's sixth largest city.

Now they must be questioning their wisdom themselves. Tate is in the news again, and not because he runs girlie bars and bikini contests:

A $1 MILLION push by the Liberal Party to seize control of Gold Coast City Council is set to be rocked by revelations that properties owned by its mayoral candidate are included in secret plans to build a casino in the heart of Surfers Paradise.
Beaten to the heart of the story, the Gold Coast Bulletin is reduced to reporting on the news that breaks right in front of them:

But before hopping on the bus the Liberal team was involved in a fracas with a photographer from The Australian newspaper. Mr Tate said he was being 'set up' and refused to be in a photo.

Several of his team including Division 7 candidate Jim MacAnally attempted to intimidate photographer Patrick Hamilton. "Look we just want to focus on getting the job done. There are people trying to set me up," said Mr Tate. "They want to pin me on secret deals with developers and getting money from developers.
... and burying the story in the middle of a silly report on a silly stunt:

Libs plan to end gridlock

LIBERAL mayoral candidate Tom Tate will today unveil his grand plan to fix the Gold Coast's crippled transport system... The Liberal team yesterday caught a Surfside bus from Griffith University to Mudgeeraba to illustrate the extent of gridlock.
If the full story is not front or page 3 news tomorrow, the Gold Coast Bulletin can cease any pretensions it still has to being a 'news' paper.

-- Nick

Saturday, February 23, 2008

You Asked For It

One might be amused at a hotbed of left-leaners such as the public service copping a swipe from Kev the Slasher:

CENTRELINK will make about 2000 workers redundant to achieve budget savings demanded by the Rudd Government's razor gang. Centrelink chief executive Jeff Whalan said his budget would be cut by at least $150 million next financial year.
But that would be mean, not just to those voted for their sackers but to those public servants who didn't.

One also finds nothing funny about practises that are guaranteed to send the economy into a hard to control downward spiral by not only reducing the number of jobs available in the first instance but also creating a perception of an economy going bad.

Other reports suggest 'front line' jobs will be retained.

Of course. You need people at the counters to serve their former managers.

One person who will be pleased is the woman with whom we chatted while queuing to vote last year. She said strong employment was making it so difficult to get staff for her small business. "A bit of unemployment would be good for me!" she said quite seriously. She also announced her intent to vote Labor.

She may remain pleased with the ability to pick and choose staff in the near future until such time as her business goes bung and she's standing in a different kind of gueue. Then she'll find how good a bit of unemployment is for her.

-- Nick

Friday, February 15, 2008

Man Lying On Train Tracks Hit By Train

We're sorry.

Now stop raping your kids.


Just a day after the Rudd Government's cashless apology, Neville Austin, a 44-year-old from the northern Melbourne suburb Reservoir, is launching the first stolen generation claim against the State of Victoria. The suit could trigger mass action by Aborigines around Australia and comes amid fresh calls for a state-based compensation fund.
Man! Never saw that coming...

-- Nick

Monday, February 11, 2008

Can You Handle The Truth?

A journalist friend once covered an inquest into an accidental death at which the deceased's widow was asked if she had any questions for the investigating officers.

She had only one, for the policeman who had been first one the scene: did her husband suffer?

"No," said the cop, "he'd died instantly."

One's journalist friend knew the particular cop and spotted his 'tell'. "You were lying," she suggested to him afterwards. "Yes," he replied. "The back of the poor bastard's head was missing and he was alive and conscious for at least 10 minutes after I got there. But I couldn't tell her that."

You can accept the official version:

Pte Kovco died from a single shot to the head, fired from his own service pistol at his barracks in Baghdad in April 2006. An earlier military inquiry found he shot himself accidentally while "skylarking" with his weapon.
Or you can insist on the truth: the month before he was deployed to Iraq, Pte Kovco had a brief affair with a woman in Brisbane. He told her he had been molested by a 17-year-old neighbour when he was young and had thought about shooting himself in the head. "He said that he was drinking and on the back of a ute in a paddock when his father came and stopped him."
-- Nick

Saturday, February 09, 2008

Females Perv On Male Toiletgoers, Shocked By What They See

Freaky the hostel owner may well be:

A NORTHERN Territory hostel displaying posters of Nazi soldiers degrading women has been accused of lacking moral judgment. Two female Israeli backpackers were disgusted after seeing the posters on the walls in the men's toilets at Annie's Place backpackers in Alice Springs. They made a report to the B'nai B'rith Anti-Defamation Commission which is considering further action against the hostel.
But what were two female backpackers doing in the men's toilets and since when has 'lacking moral judgement' been a crime?

-- Nick

Thursday, February 07, 2008

"He Could Not See A Way Forward"

The stupid, meaningless deaths of drunken idiots falling from balconies and drug-addled criminals crashing stolen cars are frequently described by our misguided media as 'tragic'.

But this is tragic:

An estate agent and his client were shocked to discover a dead body hanging in the wardrobe of a house they were viewing.
-- Nick

Monday, February 04, 2008

Golden Staph, Anyone?

Another day, another British delight:

Muslim medical students are refusing to obey hygiene rules brought in to stop the spread of deadly superbugs, because they say it is against their religion. Women training in several hospitals in England have raised objections to removing their arm coverings in theatre and to rolling up their sleeves when washing their hands, because it is regarded as immodest in Islam.
It's ok though - the solution is accomodation:

...the Islamic Medical Association (suggested) "...produce long, sterile, disposable gloves which go up to the elbows."
-- Nick

Brought To Heel

If only the benefits outweighed the bunions:

Scientists say a good pair of high heels can help tone the body, condition muscles and even improve the wearer's sex life.
And that doesn't include keeping them on during sex.

-- Nick

Journalist Dismayed

Journalist Tory Maguire asks:

Who's teaching young women that the way to handle an encounter with police is to get violent?
Tory's confused, can't figure out a reason why:

It can't just be alcohol - Generation Y hardly invented binge drinking. And demographics seems to have little to do with it either.
The answer to the question is that when feminists pushed the 'girls can do anything' mantra, the unspoken bit was 'anything boys can do' and they neglected to add 'but you should't do everything'.

Water finds its own level and that level is usually down.

-- Nick

Update: Girls can do anything - except simple arithmetic, it seems, so it's somebody else's fault that even grown women is responsible managerial jobs get drunk:

Women tricked into binge drinking
By Ellen Connolly

...Professor Allsop said research had also shown that women's increased independence, both financially and socially, had led to females becoming heavy drinkers. Women in higher-paid jobs, particularly those in managerial positions, were especially vulnerable, research had found.
It's because they can't figure out how much they're drinking:

Lisa Chu, 28, said she found it difficult to keep track. "I never know how much I'm drinking," she said. "My wine glasses at home are large. How do you know?"
Here's a clue, Einstein - look on the back of the average 750ml wine bottle. If it says 7.5 standard drinks, then 100ml is a standard drink. If you can't visualise it, get a measuring cup from the kitchen.

The government response is legislation, of course, which they are 'forced' to do for the good of idiots:

The federal Government has been forced to respond to the problem and will introduce new standard-drink logos on wine bottles to better educate people. A Department of Health spokeswoman said the labels would more clearly identify the number of standard drinks within a product.
Because, of course, the above method is too complex even for executives.

Coming soon to wine labels - 'Alcohol Damages Your Health' and colour photos of rancid livers.

Sunday, February 03, 2008

Light Dhimming Over England

Bigamy is illegal in Britain but men who go overseas to break the law will be able to get extra spouse support when they return:

Husbands with multiple wives have been given the go-ahead to claim extra welfare benefits following a year-long Government review...

Even though bigamy is a crime in Britain, the decision (means) polygamous marriages can now be recognised formally by the state, so long as the weddings took place in countries where the arrangement is legal.

The outcome will chiefly benefit Muslim men with more than one wife, as is permitted under Islamic law.
The extra money will be paid directly into the man's bank account, if the family agrees. Which of course they will.

Sharia law. Coming soon to a country near you.

-- Nick

Saturday, February 02, 2008

Symbiotic Redemption?

It's the story of redemption from the most unexpected of sources:

A dirty, disheveled Keith Peeler had been living on the streets for nearly a year when a crew of 20-somethings with cameras jumped out of a van and headed straight for him. Some of Peeler's homeless buddies wanted to run.

But the young people had an offer: $10 a day, plus close to minimum wage, to appear on what they were calling "Homeless Real World," an Internet spoof of MTV's reality show.
What was almost certainly conceived to be a vicious, unkind, exploitative piece of trash TV ended up being something quite different:

Four of the six cast members, including Peeler, have gotten off the streets with help from the producers.

After shooting was completed last spring, ManiaTV's filmmakers drove several cast members to detox centers, some more than once, and drove another to job interviews.

"It was time to come in from the cold," Peeler, 53, said recently. He and fellow cast member Johnny "Sgt. Stutters" Kibodeaux, 51, have been sober for almost nine months and are living at rehab centers, where they are working as kitchen managers.

Producer Darwyn Metzger said the filmmakers became attached to the homeless.

"Once you make that personal connection with them, you feel you have to go above and beyond," Metzger said. "I think we were all inspired by the fact they were very honest and had good hearts."
The kicker is in the story's last paragraph:

"I'm not proud of the fact I was drunk on the streets," Peeler said. "It's not who I really think I am, but I don't want to forget that's where I come from. I always have the option of going back there. I have to always be aware of that."
Read it all.

-- Nora

It's A Do(o)zy

While we're in a You Tube sharing mood, here's another one.

It's the best five minutes you'll spend today:

Hat Tip to Tim Blair and Ken H.

-- Nora

Friday, February 01, 2008

His Name Makes No Sense

Tee hee,

Who said local government elections had to be boring. This is gold:

Golden Driver
1 fifth tequila
1 orange juice
1 lime
ice cubes
Fill a short glass with ice. Pour the tequila into glass until about half full (. Top off with the OJ. Squeeze a slice of lime into the drink. Enjoy!

-- Nora